Congratulations to Umeh Kamsiyochukwu Nkechinyere, who came tops in the 2023 JAMB UTME examinations. I was doubly delighted to see her on national television fielding questions from an interview panel. Brilliant girl! 

It is also my pleasure to celebrate Achunike Okafor, another Nigerian teenager who scored the highest among 2,649 graduates in the Class of 2023 in Newark, United States. Both teenagers are among the best of our children. Their trajectory suggests that our future is assured. 

When the management of the Deeper Life High School, Mowe, Ogun State, rolled out the drums to celebrate the 16-year-old who had brought honour to the school, her achievement attracted national attention because a totally different person, Ejikeme Mmesoma, was attempting to steal the glory of being the highest scorer. JAMB had  declared Kamsiyochukwu the top scorer with an aggregate score of 360 and the government of Anambra State, her home state, had decided to honour her as is customary every year, but one Ejikeme Joy Mmesoma, a 19-year-old student of Anglican Girls’ Secondary School, Uruagu Nnewi, protested to the state government that she scored 362 and ought to have been honoured with the highest scorer’s award. 

The Anambra State government decided to seek confirmation of Mmesoma’s claim of scoring 362 from JAMB. The printout she was flaunting as proof of her scores was an old format last used in 2021. Out of the 1,5586,765 candidates who took the 2023 examination, only Mmesoma printed out the old format with a cloned QR code pinched from another person’s 2021 result. The fortuitous change in the design of the result notification in 2021 gave away the game immediately. How could only one person, out of 1.5 million candidates, be parading a different certification or proof of scores? 

It is natural that one tends to side with the underdog. That explains the outpouring of emotional support on social media for the ‘poor’ student. Anything that has to do with government evokes the basest of emotions in people who have been at the receiving end of many anti-people policies and incompetencies of government.

The errant girl’s case was further convoluted by do-gooders who did not bother to verify the facts they flaunted. Those among them who flayed JAMB for terrorising a ‘minor’ could easily have checked her real age if truth was their goal. A 19-year-old cannot be described as a minor! 

Some said JAMB had no right to parade the girl before the world as a fraudster. However, the girl was the one parading herself. I didn’t know what she looked like until she was misadvised to release a video which, ironically, confirmed her fraud rather than indict JAMB. Even the document she was parading stated her examination centre wrongly. Since 2021, the Centre’s name had been changed from Thomas Chidoka Center for Human Development to “Nkemefuna Foundation (Thomas Chidoka Center for Human Development)”. How come Mmesoma’s document reflects the centre’s former name?

Nobody would have heard of her if she had not presented herself to the Anambra State government as the highest scorer in JAMB of 2023. She had already collected a prize money of N3 million from Innoson Motors before her misadventure with the state government. It was in the process of verification by the Anambra State government that her lie was exposed. 

The truth, without any padding or frills, is that Mmesoma, having already fraudulently collected N3 million from the proprietor of  Innoson Motors heard that the Anambra State government was going to honour Kamsiyochukwu Umeh as the highest scorer in UTME 2023, and decided to waylay her by claiming to be the rightful winner. She did not reckon with the layers of verification embedded in the JAMB system.

Some critics accused JAMB of playing accuser, investigator and judge. That is untrue. JAMB merely exposed the fact that the result being paraded was fraudulent. Fraud is fraud. There is no softer name for fraud committed by a teenager. And the attempt to ethnicise the matter was so gut-wrenchingly odious. Mercifully, we now know that the authentic winner, Kamsiyochukwu, is also from the same Southeast geopolitical zone as Mmesoma. Many people did not even know that Mmesoma hails from Enugu State until the report of the investigative panel was released, showing that she is an Enugu State indigene resident in Anambra. The world loves a winner; a villain is quickly shown the road to her father’s compound!

It is instructive that Mmesoma did not confess to her fraudulent activities until she was literally confronted with the jailhouse. Had she persisted in her lies, the case would have gone to court and she would have bagged seven years imprisonment if convicted. “There is no art to find the mind’s construction in the face”, says Shakespeare. Mmesoma is a classic example. 

JAMB’s claim that its system is transparent and user-friendly can actually be verified by any interested party. One can check any result via phone by sending UTMERESULT  to 55019 or 66019 on the phone number the candidate used to register for the exam. The result will be transmitted immediately to the registered phone number.

Also, anyone interested in finding out the various tricks available to crooked candidates can google websites advertising ‘miracle centres’, ‘high JAMB scores’, ‘how to improve UTME scores’ , etc. There are all sorts of offers available and no one is more aware of their existence than innocent-looking students like Mmesoma. Something tells me that her accomplices are still at large. 

For the records, here are the champions in the 2023 UTME as announced by JAMB:

Umeh Kamsiyochukwu Nkechinyere, 360

Aguele Stephen Osezuha, 358

Ositade Oluwafemi Anthony, 358

Gbolahan Azeem Ayinde, 357

John Fulfilment Ibhanfiodon, 356,

Duruji Chimdubem Ugonna, 355

Adesanya Jermaine Oluwaiomiloiu, 355

Shittu Priscilla Adedunni, 355

Atenisumen Enoch Oluwagbemisoke 355

Adetunji Victor Adewale, 355

Ofonime Iniobon Idongesit, 355

Imoukhuede Andrew Onayeme, 355

Truth be told, we have a social problem that makes people want to pass examinations at all costs. Part of the problem is the emphasis that the society places on any kind of formal test and the certification that goes with it. Many people don’t care that there is a marked difference between an aptitude test like JAMB and an achievement test such as WAEC, even though both achievement and aptitude tests measure the strengths and abilities of the test-taker. Aptitude tests focus on the potential someone has to learn new things while achievement tests focus on what has already been learned. 

The fact that a student usually comes first in class does not necessarily mean that he/she will excel in an aptitude test like JAMB. The three-year ban handed down to Mmesoma as punishment is lenient considering that the penalty on conviction is seven years imprisonment.

Let’s light a candle rather than continue to curse the darkness. What is the secret behind the success of the 2023 UTME highest scorer, Kamsiyochukwu Umeh? 

She said the secret of her success is adequate preparation and discipline instilled by her school, the Deeper Life High School, Mowe. According to her, “We started preparation immediately after we entered SSS3. This was when we started receiving pep talks on the exam; the school organised special UTME classes for us. I also practised a lot of past questions to familiarise myself with the kind of questions JAMB could bring out. I also read my textbooks and then, I paid attention when the teachers took us through classes… I have applied to the University of Lagos, and I aspire to study Chemical Engineering.I feel very excited and grateful to all my supporters and encouragers….”

Mrs. Umeh, Kamsiyochukwu’s mother, is justifiably proud of her daughter. 

“When she is studying, I also make sure to involve her in household chores. I believe that a child’s success should be holistic, not just limited to academics.…”

Congratulations, Kamsiyochukwu! You are in good company with Achunike Okafor, another Nigerian teenager, who recently received an International Baccalaureate diploma with a record-shattering 4.625 grade-point average from the Science Park High School at Newark in New Jersey, USA. Achunike’s father, Godfrey Okafor, said his son’s achievements are also a source of family pride.

His GPA is the highest among Newark’s 2,649 graduates in the Class of 2023. It earned him more than 40 scholarship offers, many from the nation’s top universities: Spoilt for choices, the 18-year-old plans to attend Harvard University to pursue a neuroscience degree. 

To our two worthy role models, Kamsiyochukwu and Achunike, let me re-echo those old-fashioned words made popular by the inimitable football king, Edson Arantes do Nascimento, a.k.a Pele: “Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do.”

We should congratulate the Joint Admissions and Matriculations Board (JAMB) for proving the integrity of its result release process this week. In a country where the non-performance and self-sabotage of national institutions are an ever-present embarrassment, demonstrating the forgery of the result presented by a candidate in its last United Tertiary Matriculation Examination (UTME) is a feat!

I say that because many Nigerians, including yours truly, did not see it coming. Years of abuse of the people’s trust have turned us into sceptics who only expect the worst from our government and its agencies.

There are countless reasons to justify our cynicism. As recently as the 2023 general elections, scandalous images were sighted on the Independent Electoral Commission’s (INEC) portal. That is not to speak of non-existent names on the voters’ list or thousands of voters’ cards discovered in the forests by hunters in Anambra State.

Nigeria cannot conduct a credible census amidst so many other scandalous incapacities. I laughed when JAMB spokesperson, Fabian Benjamin, painted the quick response (QR) code as the magic bullet to unravelling the truth in the Miss Mmesoma Ejikeme result controversy.

I recalled the experience of many Nigerians with the QR code on the COVID-19 vaccination card between 2020 and 2021. Many people got to the places where they needed to use these cards to discover that their names, dates of birth, and other vital statistics had been muddled up. Some Nigerians still have sour stories to tell about their national identification numbers (NIN). We are a country that makes a mess of producing travel documents for its people, guarding its people properly, securing the borders effectively and even correctly educating its children. It has been a lifetime of sub-optimal service delivery for a significant number of our population, they are used to it, and it is the only way they know!

JAMB is not exempt from the logistical disorder that has become our albatross. It is doubtful that any Nigerian family exists without some story about JAMB’s tackiness. For instance, the board has for some years insisted that candidates take exclusive computer-based tests. But even as recent as its last examination, there were complaints of logistics issues where candidates to far-flung centres other than their choice, even though they were meant to start examinations as early 6:30am.

There are also problems with students at public schools who do not have access to computers before the exams. We heard stories about the failure of biometrics, login details and outright postponement of examinations. In some cases, the facilities did not even have the capacity to take the number of candidates they had. That is not to speak about the exploitative levels of expenditure to which parents are exposed.

So, if you wondered where the attack poured out against JAMB this week came from, it is from the groundswell of disappointment that Nigerians have endured from national institutions over the years. Stemming from these inefficiencies, when a Nigerian conflicts with an institution of the state, the tendency is for many people to take sides with the citizen without even thinking about it!

Why is this so?

The country and its institutions work for only a few people who have captured the state. We have a criminally run society where the commonwealth is in the custody of a few, such that every other person is left in a rat race to survive. It is a country where almost nothing works, everyone is on his own, and only God is for us all. This is why JAMB’s success in justifying its position on the Mmesoma case warms the heart.

Yet the entire event raises a few questions about the operations of JAMB. One wonders why the board has yet to find a permanent solution to the unceasing attempts to manipulate its process over the years. This failure is one of the reasons stakeholders, including higher institutions of learning, don’t trust JAMB. Otherwise, why do the institutions organise post-UTME examinations? Shouldn’t the UMTE just be enough?

There are also speculations about collusions between JAMB staffers on the one hand, and candidates and their parents on the other, to compromise processes. These opportunities were usually for the highest bidders and out of the reach of many poor people who desired higher education for their children.

Not to be left out, many parents have also learnt to do whatever they can for their children to pass examinations and gain admission. So, we have heard of special centres where invigilators and schoolteachers are paid to “assist” candidates during examinations. Apparently, the fake app revealed a few days ago is another attempt on how to beat the system and cheat other Nigerians. It is a country where the end justifies the means, where success by any means possible is the deal.

And while it is convenient to blame candidates and their parents for the desperation that precipitates these compromises, we must consider society’s role in the frustration of families.

First off, Nigeria suggests to its people that life can only be meaningful with formal education leading to a degree. Even though most progressive societies show that this is a fallacy. People only need a measure of basic education, after which society should avail them of options which fit their natural endowments. But Nigeria has tuned its people to believe that educational certificates are their only tickets to livelihood. Now, that probably wouldn’t be such a terrible proposition, except that the country cannot even live up to the idea.

This is so because the country only has placements for some of those who sit for the UTME examination annually. For instance, JAMB says that 1.6 million candidates wrote the examination this year; but there is space for less than 50% of these numbers. So, you make everyone in your country aspire for higher education but do not provide enough opportunities.

To make things worse, merit and hard work count for little or nothing here. The result is that citizens throw their best effort into surviving since the country cares for no one. It is like a jungle where only the fittest survive. Unwitting you bring your children up in this environment, making them believe it is the right way to do things.

This is why it is a shame that people reduce these incidents to ethnic or religious levels. The country has been grossly unfair to majority of citizens and in essence, it has lost the loyalty of the average man and woman. The reality is that we all find ways to get the better of Nigeria. Regardless of tribe and tongue, we position ourselves and our families to exploit the country and other citizens. the average Nigerian only cares about himself and his family.

We do this in so many ways that we may not take cognisance of. The civil servants who will not move files without a greased palm; the director who would not approve payment for a contract unless ten per cent is added; the company director who marks up a project budget by 30 per cent; the clergy whose God is money; the doctor in a public facility who demands money for appointments and diverts resources to his private clinic; the immigration officer who manipulates procedures for procurement of passports; the customs officer who allows contrabands into the country; the teacher who awards marks after “obtaining” the student; the parent who purchases questions for his child; the student who cheats in examinations; the reporter who pushes his conscience out of the way and sells his newspaper space to the highest bidder in betrayal of public trust; the traditional ruler who scarifies the interest of his people for a bowl of pottage and so on, all contribute to the sorry state of our country. It is sheer hypocrisy for anyone to suggest that only a group of people are the trouble with the country. And we should stop such parochialism in the interest of our children.

The JAMB/Ejikeme debacle tells us that we are building a country without values. Rather than tear us apart and cause us to take sides one way or the other, citizens should demand leadership that works for and restores the people’s confidence in their country. Government, parents, schools, and religious establishments should be concerned about the values we instil in our children. It is the only way this country will not crash on us all, as it surely will if we go on this way.

Nigerians are in for a few surprises as President Bola Tinubu unveils his new cabinet in a few days. Both in composition, size and structure, the next federal executive council would far different from what we’ve always known.

A Lagos banker and politician, Senator Mukhail Adetokunbo Abiru will likely emerge as the new finance minister when President Bola Tinubu unveils his cabinet in a few days. The president has only 20 days left out of the 60 allowed by the constitution for him to send his list of ministers to the senate.

Senator Abiru currently represents Lagos East senatorial district in the senate. Born March 25, 1964, he was also the group managing director & chief executive of Polaris Bank. He holds a Bachelor’s degree in Economics from Lagos State University and is a fellow of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria (ICAN). In addition, Senator Abiru had also attended several courses at Harvard Business School and Lagos Business School. He was executive director at First Bank (2013-2016) and commissioner of finance in Lagos state (2011-2013) under the Babatunde Fashola administration. He resigned as the bank CEO in 2020 to run for the senatorial seat.

Contrary to expectations, the new cabinet would be a large one, consisting of 42 ministers and 20 special advisers. But unlike in the past administrations, there will be no minister of state in the Tinubu government. Special advisers will contribute to discussions of FEC, unlike in the past when they were only silent participants.

Some large ministries would be broken into two and some into three to create enough portfolios for the cabinet members. Those to be split include works & housing; agriculture & rural development; humanitarian affairs, disaster management & social development; sports & youth; health; education; transport; finance, national planning & budget; petroleum and a few others.

Dele Alake, currently special adviser on special duties, communication & strategy will move up as minister of public communication, a new name for the information ministry. He will also double as the presidential spokesman and may continue to work out of the presidential villa or split his time between the villa and the ministry at Radio House. So far, Alake is one of the closest persons to the president and a very influential member of the administration. In a way, renaming the information ministry and combining it with the function of the presidential spokesperson is akin to what obtains in many advanced democracies where the press secretary is the only official responsible for the public communication of the government.

In addition to restructuring the government, the president has also been busy trying to sift his preferred nominees from a long list of interested party officials, some of whom were recommended by party bigwigs in different states. Former Ekiti governor Kayode Fayemi is being considered as the new foreign affairs minister. It is a portfolio he’s always craved even in the Buhari administration in which he served as minister of mines and steel. But he lost out to Geoffrey Onyema, who came highly recommended by the late chief of staff to the President. Both Onyeama and the late Abba Kyari were childhood friends, dating back to their school days in the UK.

Bayo Onanuga, who also worked hard for the president’s election, is also being considered for a job in the government. Onanuga was one of the spokesmen of the Tinubu campaign, but Nigerians will readily remember him by the inflammatory statements and ethnically insensitive outburst that he made in the immediate aftermath of the elections in Lagos. A versatile journalist, he was the managing director of NAN in the early days of the Buhari administration. “Although Bayo embarrassed himself and the president with his incendiary outbursts, he may not be left behind,” a political leader from Oyo state told me in the course of researching this article.

Festus Keyamo, SAN, has been fighting tooth and nail to be the new minister of justice & attorney-general. He wanted that position badly in the Buhari government, but he stood no chance against the all-powerful Abubakar Malami, another SAN. At his senate confirmation hearing in July 2019, Keyamo told the lawmakers that his priority would be to decentralise the supreme court into six, one for each geopolitical zone. It is not clear if Keyamo would be lucky this time.

Another new face to look out for in the Tinubu cabinet is Tunji Bello, a veteran journalist of impressive track record, who is also a longtime associate of the president’s. Like Dele Alake, Bello was also editor of the National Concord, the defunct newspaper owned by the late MKO Abiola. Bello later served as a commissioner under Tinubu and Fashola, and SSG under Ambode and returned as a commissioner under Sanwo-Olu. He has been in the government of Lagos state since May 1999. His wife was appointed the VC of Lagos State University in 2021. Don’t mess with some Lagosians!

What will also surprise many Nigerians would be the emergence of some very senior politicians, who had held almost all leadership positions in the past, in the cabinet. Two former governors of Kano, Senator Rabiu Musa Kwakwanso and Abdullai Umar Ganduje, are fighting hard to join the cabinet. The former was the presidential candidate of NNPP in the February elections. He was minister of internal affairs (now interior) in the first term of President Obasanjo. Of course, former governor of Rivers State, Nyesom Wike, is also interested in returning as a minister. He served President Jonathan as minister of state, education. Nigerians usually scoff at the “recycling” of old politicians into government. But their experience could also be useful. “These people are not looking for a job in that sense of the word. They just cannot shake off the urge to be in public office all the time, for whatever reasons,” a senior government official told me last night.

I have also been told that the president may rationalise some agencies and parastatals to achieve optimum functionality. For instance, three important revenue earners – FIRS, NIMASA and Customs – could be consolidated under one big group to be headed by the special adviser on revenue, Zacchaeus Adedeji. “This is essentially to block leakages and tighten fiscal control,” one of the highbrow members of the administrations said this morning.

Journalists will be pleased with the preponderance of their colleagues in the new administration: Alake, Bello, Onanuga and Tunde Rahman. Rahman is a former editor of Thisday newspaper who has served Bola Tinubu as a media staff for a long time. He has since assumed duties as the president’s principal private secretary. Certainly, a good journalist can fit into any role. But in which other administration have journalists been this plenty, and how will this help the profession?

Remember my article a few weeks ago on the appointment of Wale Edun as the special adviser on monetary matters? I had argued that the rather unusual designation could be a pointer to his eventual elevation as the new CBN Governor. I have nothing more to add.

In the life of a nation, especially in the third world, some strange occurrences occasionally take the centre stage to the anxiety of the people. No one is usually able to dissuade everyone from superstition during such periods especially because the occurrences are felt across board in the relevant community.

From history, we know for example, that a short period after the annulment of the famous June 12, 1993 presidential elections in Nigeria, two major leaders associated with the development died suddenly. The two leaders, General Sani Abacha who was then Head of State and Chief Moshood Abiola from whom the electoral victory was snatched reportedly died within the space of one-month in 1998. Their dissimilar deaths were attributed to what was called cardiac arrest. 

Not many believed the story. Indeed, there were people who imagined that those in government who announced the cause of the death of both leaders did not themselves believe in what they told the rest of us. This was worsened by a report credited to Hamza Al-Mustapha, who served as Chief Security Officer to late General Abacha that it was what killed his late boss that killed Chief Abiola.

The sad conclusion till today is that it was an era of cardiac arrest which health sector workers see as a normal and critical health challenge.But to the layman in Nigeria cardiac arrest was the era’s way of explaining something off. This happens quite often in the country in several service areas where some inexplicable occurrences are attributed to what the rest of us cannot verify. The unending ‘due operational reasons’ in our air transportation system which is hardly ever at play in other climes is a good example.

An important narrative of the cardiac arrest stories is that they quite often concern notable political leaders. When foremost governor of Bayelsa State, Diepreye Alamieyeseigha died in 2015, the explanation that it was due to cardiac arrest was doubted by some of our common friends. Perhaps there is ample sense after all in discouraging the use of terms that the ordinary person impulsively disbelieves. It is in fact more critical when it concerns technology that works like magic.

The 2019 presidential election in Nigeria for instance, was believed in several circles to have been won by Atiku Abubakar,the candidate of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP). All efforts to technically verify the results failed because it was not in the interest of the ruling party to continue the search beyond the official statement by the Independent National Electoral Commission INEC.

Many Nigerians still believe that the INEC server would have given a better record of the transactions but lawyers of the ruling party held on to a claim that INEC did not have a server. As is usual when explaining things off, no one was able to convince many that INEC truly had no server. In any case, there were reports that the electoral body’s budget which was approved and fully released included the procurement of a server. References were made to the fact that INEC did not only acquire a server, it appointed and trained operators on it. There was even an official plan that the commission would have two collation officers, one for manual and the other for digital thereby suggesting that there was indeed, a server. 

As in the cardiac arrest story, several versions would suddenly emerge to completely confuse human understanding of the issues at stake. The ruling party at a point accused the PDP of having hacked the INEC server without recognising the irrationality of hacking a server that it had claimed to be non-existent.  So, some analysts came to the conclusion that there was a server which was probably yet to be put in use. The implication of the narrative is that except utmost care is taken, it would be very easy for Nigeria to fall into the era of fake technology. Against the backdrop of an exceedingly desperate political class, new technologies which have become the redeeming feature of society; helping developed nations to attain global heights may only be used for mischief in Nigeria  

Unfortunately, this has just happened during the recently concluded presidential election of February 25, 2023 in which an inexplicable technical hitch divided Nigeria into two. Incidentally, there were other elections held simultaneously with that of the presidential but which escaped the smart edgesof technical failure. With the results of the senatorial as well as that of house of representatives elections remaining technically clean, people are left to suspect that the glitches which occurred during the general electionsmay have been directional to only the presidential election.  However, INEC appears certain that its failure to upload the results was due to technical glitches and not any form of sabotage or cyber attack.

According to its official spokesperson, Festus Okoye, INEC’s system especially its result viewing portal more technically called the IReV portal ‘remained well-secured with no evidence of intrusions.’ For some time to come, the term technical glitches would be used to explain things off because of the complication introduced to it by Lai Mohammed, the immediate past Nigerian Information Minister.

While in Washington to engage with international media organizations in the United States, Lai reportedly said that INEC’s decision to withhold the upload of results during the election was because of a suspected cyberattack. Although he as usual claimed to have been misquoted, delving into the subject of technical glitches was uncalled for because the electoral body is an independent entity that could better speak for itself.

Evidence that public perception of technical glitches had already turned the term into an explicable phenomenon emerged when the office of the Accountant General of the federation (OAGF) used the same term to explain its inability to pay salaries of several workers for the month of June 2023. The OAGF’s director of press, Bawa Mokwa was reported to have said that the problem was caused by technical issues with the government’s Integrated Financial Management System. To the workers who have become stranded over no salary, technical terms may neither be believed nor useful. Rather, many will continue to see it as an extension of the INEC technical glitches to them, notwithstanding the absence of any links between them and the election portal.

It is not only workers without pay that may have embraced a fixated mindset that Nigerian organizations cherish the use of technology to explain off issues; many students, parents and other groups interested in the work of the Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board were already warming up. The controversy concerned a young Nigerian student Joy Mmesoma Ejikeme whose Jamb score had been declared to be fake by the foremost exam body. Many critics who never get details of issues before jumping to conclusion on them were already condemning JAMB. But those who have followed the outstanding transformation of JAMB since Professor Ishaq Oloyede became its Chief Executive in 2016 must have had no doubt that JAMB’s integrity is not easy to successfully attack.

On May 10, 2019, this column’s article of the week titled “INEC should emulate Jamb’s Ishaq Oloyede” was perhaps seen as mere praise singing. But through investigative journalism it was easy to see that Oloyede had his eyes on the verdict of history. As at that time, he had built up JAMB’s technical integrity to know the following as they happen: a) when a centre registers a candidate, b) the exact time the candidate was registered, c) who registered the candidate, d) the computer system used and e) the correct and exact location of the registration centre.  Without repeating the details of Ejikeme’s case because of the age of the girl, Jamb’s transparent handling instructively establishes that the only solution to irregularities in human affairs is the adoption of technology that is subjected to constant updating.

The stories of the last 6 months in Nigeria show clearly that the country has entered the era of technicalities. Organizations which do not fall in line will suddenly find that whereas technical glitches can be used to explain off their challenges, nothing would wipe off their basic failures from the immutable record in human memories. The National Population Commission (NPC) that is gearing up for the coming national population and housing census would have no excuse if like othersin the past, fail to heed caution.

My uncle recently asked me to help guide and counsel his son, who is at that discouraging state which many young Nigerians find themselves in after graduating from the university, doing the national youth service and trying their hands on a few endeavours without success. What many of them tend to do is “japa” — believing that being a toilet cleaner in “the abroad” is better than being an employer in Nigeria. I invited my cousin for lunch and had a heart-to-heart chat with him. I was almost in tears at the end. This boy plainly told me he believes in Nigeria, does not fancy “japa” as an option, and would love to stay back in the country, put his skills to use and make a decent living.

Regrettably, the country would not let him be. He told me that after his national service, he had set up a logistics business in Lagos state. He had two motorbikes he was using for the business. “I was doing quite well,” he said. “But Lagos state government officials killed the business. There were so many levies and fees and regulatory demands I just couldn’t cope with. Thugs were seizing the bikes every day. It was always one problem or the other. It was so frustrating. As you are renewing one paper, another is expiring. It was impossible to keep up. I decided to pack everything up. I had had enough. I wanted to work with my hands and create value with my ideas but they wouldn’t let me.”

This is the story of many Nigerians who want to go into business. They are not applying for CBN or NNPC jobs. They are not interested in working for Shell or MTN. They don’t want to do yahoo-yahoo. They want to work honestly and with dignity, using their hands and business acumen to create jobs and value not just for themselves but for others too. But what do they get in return? Harassment, extortion and the sledge hammer from bloodthirsty state agencies. It shows the quality of thinking among those in authority in Nigeria. In any country where the leaders truly understand how development works, they would help, not hurt, the micro, small and medium enterprises (MSMEs).

All over the world, including the most developed countries, MSMEs are recognised as the engine of the economy. When aggregated, they are the biggest employers of labour. Logically, governments desirous of tackling unemployment, poverty and crime would provide incentives to make doing business less stressful for them. MSMEs can help expand the economy and create more jobs. Sensible governments would design policies to help them thrive. But in our dearly beloved Nigeria, the opposite is the case. It is as if you have killed somebody by opening a shop. The way ministries, agencies and departments (MDAs) descend on you makes you feel you are an enemy of the state.

I told my cousin I have been a victim myself. In 2014, I started a publishing company from my sweat. We did not get any incentive as a small business from either federal or state government. What we started getting were visits from tax officials, most of whom were not genuinely interested in looking into our books but how to fill their own pockets. In 2019, we got a demand notice over PAYE. It listed employees we only engaged in 2017 as having been on our payroll from 2011 when the company was registered (we started operations exactly in April 2014). They made up salaries for them and calculated their imagined PAYE in arrears, complete with penalties and compound interest.

We once got a letter from FIRS seeking to audit our accounts over a five-year period to determine our compliance with payments and remittances, including VAT. We were so sure we were compliant and had nothing to hide, but we were only being stupid. By the time they were done, the auditors slammed a liability of almost N15 million on us for “overstated expenses”. They said we did not show evidence that our reporters actually bought the internet data for which we gave them monthly allowances. They also said the weekly transport fare we gave our journalists for reportorial duties were not receipted. Imagine asking a danfo driver for receipt for a trip from Ikeja to Ketu!

To be sure, I have no issues with tax audits. I am an advocate of ethical business practices. I hate cutting corners. But Nigeria will humble you. Nigeria will make you question your values as well as your sanity. We were so frustrated one day that we asked the tax collectors why they were doing this to us. One confessed that they had targets to meet and would not go back to their bosses and say they didn’t find anything wrong with our accounts. More so, they get bonuses for meeting their targets, so the system has created a perverse incentive which works for the tax collectors but against businesses. What he did not confess was that they were also using audits to extort businesses.

I was so incensed after one of those endless audits that I asked our tax consultant to sternly dispute the assessment and let the matter end up at the tribunal. I was so sure we did not commit any infractions. It was driving me nuts. But our tax consultant said while he was not opposed to us going to the tax appeal tribunal, it would be a waste of time and money. We would have to engage subject-matter lawyers, pay legal fees and, at the end of it all, there is no guarantee that the tribunal, a government body, will not take sides with a fellow public agency. Only the big corporates have the war chest for a robust legal battle. They also have the clout to survive the warped system. 

Common sense tells you to allow a seed grow first before you start harvesting. It appears government is committed to killing the seed instead, as my cousin can testify. If small businesses are allowed to grow and flourish, there will be millions of jobs created and an endless value chain unleashed. There will be plenty revenue to follow: VAT, PAYE, withholding tax and other taxes. But the starting point is to let them breathe. Is this too complicated to understand? In truth, government agents have become terrorists to small businesses. They gleefully give business owners anxiety and high blood pressure. They derive pleasure from using state power to inflict pains on Nigerians.

The most notorious government agencies operate in the FCT. I once wrote about a friend who owns a bakery in Abuja. All manner of government officials come to the bakery almost every day from all manner of agencies. Three units from the Abuja Municipal Council Area (AMAC) do “health inspection”. The National Agency for Food and Drug Administration and Control (NAFDAC), the Nigeria Social Insurance Trust Fund (NSTIF) and the Standards Organisation of Nigeria (SON) also do “health inspection”. Believe me, one agency can do all the health checks — but this is Nigeria. There is an annual licence fee for “operating in FCT”. There is a fee for “using a car to distribute bread”.

That is not all. The Federal Housing Authority (FHA) and AMAC charge the bakery separately for “fumigation”. You cannot engage your own fumigator — you have to use their consultants. There is also the AMAC “sanitary inspection” fee. AMAC’s department of environment collects fees yearly to inspect — you guessed it — the environment. There is also the AMAC fee for “food and water-related handling”. The list is endless. I am not suggesting that small businesses should not be regulated, inspected or asked to pay taxes. These are the functions of the state. But, for Pete’s sake, how many taxes and levies should an MSME pay? How many regulators should an MSME face?

You can now imagine my delight that President Bola Ahmed Tinubu has set up a committee on fiscal policy and tax reforms. Since he has shown clearly that he is pro-business, I would be equally delighted if he would champion the cause of MSMEs. He should take it as a personal mission and rally the 36 governors to do everything to enhance the success and growth of these businesses. I understand that states and the FCT are driven by the singular motive of improving internally generated revenue (IGR). But this drive has become a toxic tonic for their agents to go totally out of control, forgetting that you need these businesses to survive and thrive first before you tax them.

My agenda for Tinubu in this regard is fairly simple: he should use his presidential power and moral authority to set the tone for all tiers of government on the need to make Nigeria business-friendly. We need to spread, not suffocate, businesses. First, I propose that there should be a one-stop centre to offer support to MSMEs in matters of registration, documentation, levies and taxes to end this hostile and suffocating system. Many agencies perform similar functions and make similar demands of businesses. Some businesses are targeted for frequent audit while many are outside the tax net. Through a robust support system, some of these complications can be streamlined and simplified.

Second, there should be a dispute resolution mechanism that is fair to all. The government is usually the accuser and the judge. If an agency inspects your factory, unfairly decides there is an infraction and shuts it down, you cannot ask for independent assessment. That is why extortion is normalised. The word of the agencies is law. And they are using this to the maximum. Some agencies engage thugs for enforcement. I would never forget when FIRS was using armed policemen to enforce tax collection in 2016. It was the height of official rascality at a time the economy was under enormous strain as a result of a recession. I pray that commonsense will reign in government someday. Amen.

AND FOUR OTHER THINGS…

JAMB BITE

Mmesoma Ejimeke, a 19-year-old Anambra student, claimed to have scored 362 in UTME, attracting accolades and cash rewards for being the “best” candidate in 2023. As it turned out after all the brouhaha, she did not come first as claimed despite the massive support for her on Twitter. She actually scored 249, as she herself finally confessed. The QR code on the result slip she paraded to the media was superimposed. Yet, the saga became a source of ethnic strife and a vicious #NotMyJAMB campaign. Ironically, the highest scorer as named by JAMB is Kamsiyochukwu Umeh, also a student from Anambra. All those involved in the crime must now face the music. Justice.

OIL-POOR COUNTRY

In my previous article, I said our share of oil export is less than 400,000 bpd. Obviously, not many Nigerians know this fact. When it is reported that we export 1.4mbpd, most of it is not ours. Under joint ventures (JVs) with the oil majors, which are onshore, Nigeria used to get the lion’s share because it owned 55-60%. Under the production sharing contract (PSC), which governs offshore, the oil companies invest all the capital and recover their costs from oil production before Nigeria gets its own share. The sad part: the JVs, which favour Nigeria, are dying because of underinvestment, theft and high costs of operation while offshore, which favours the companies, is thriving. Damned.

STONE HEARTS

Mr Olukayode Egbetokun, the acting inspector-general of police (IGP), has disbanded the police team that ran over a cuffed man with a car in Edo state. The officers are reportedly undergoing disciplinary hearing. This is heartwarming. I testify that the Nigeria Police Force is always quick to discipline erring officers and this is usually in the public domain. What I still don’t understand is why these guys still behave the way they do. Is it that the punishment is not severe enough to serve as a deterrent or they are so hardened they cannot be bothered by the consequences of their actions? I sincerely would like to know. It may help the authorities take a step ahead of them. Frustrating.

AND FINALLY…

Do you remember Senator Adamu Bulkachuwa who said on video that his wife, Justice Zainab Bulkachuwa, used her position to influence judgments in the favour of his senate colleagues? Although his wife, who is former president of the Court of Appeal, later denied the claim, we may not have heard the last yet. The Independent Corrupt Practices and Other Related Offences Commission (ICPC) invited the former senator for questioning but he did not show up. Instead, he headed for the court for an injunction to stop the anti-graft agency from questioning him and declaring the invitation as “ultra vires, illegal, arbitrary, oppressive and unconstitutional”. Nigeria!

Enugu State Governor, Peter Mbah, has declared that the state was winning the war against sit-at-home enforcers and would never take orders from people he described as murderers and enemies of Igbo land.

Mbah said there was no way Enugu could become the premier destination for investment, living, and tourism or its economy grown from $4.4 billion to $30 billion when the people were still talking about or taking orders from faceless persons outside our state, insisting “we cannot be defeated by evil and we must not allow that to happen”. 

The governor urged concerted efforts by the media community and Enugu people against scaremongering and fake news, which he described as the latest resort by the sit-at-home promoters, having lost their capacity to inflict havoc on lives and property as was previously the case due to reenergised security measures applied by the government and security agencies since the ban on Monday sit-at-home in the state. 

The governor urged the newsmen to be professional in their duty by seizing the opportunity presented by investigative and modern journalism to fact-check and verify the authenticity of information before feeding them to the public.

“The truth is that we have won the actual war against sit-at-home enforcers and murderers out to destroy Enugu State and Igboland. We have unleashed the security resources on them and they have been thoroughly defeated and discomfited.

“Because they no longer have the capacity to unleash terror on lives and property of Ndi Enugu, that is why they have now resorted to scaremongering, peddling fake news, and all manner of dramas to instill fear in our people and control their minds and actions.

“We practice democracy. We can never allow murderers and terrorists to dictate to us. We must not allow those who do not have the mandate of the people to dictate for us how to live our lives; when to go out; when to close our businesses and when to sit at home.

“What we are facing now are media terrorists using social media to instigate fear and peddle fake news. We must not allow them to succeed. It is totally unacceptable. Nobody can make you inferior without your consent. These hoodlums are very few compared to our numbers. We cannot be taking instructions from hooligans.

“We must not allow those without our mandate tell us how to live our lives. We have a duty to ensure that we flush them out in all directions. They have no stake in the affairs of our state.

“It is, therefore, our responsibility to re-orientate our people to start coming out and going about their normal businesses. We have a duty to kill fake news and counter it with our superior pen and media. 

“Therefore, as we are leaving here, we must begin to tell our people the right thing; that nobody can make them inferior without their consent; that we can’t be cowed by the cowardly acts of a few people,” the governor declared.

Meanwhile, Dr. Mbah urged the people not to be deceived by those who use the name of Mazi Nnamdi Kanu as a cover for their criminalities, noting that Mazi Kanu had since expressed his displeasure at the enforcement of sit-at-home and consequent havocs on Igbo land.

Mbah said the state was equally exploring the option of dragging both the instigators and enforcers of violence and illegal sit-at-home order in the State before the International Criminal Court (ICC) in the Hague to answer to the crimes against humanity, noting that in the 21st Century, nobody should be allowed to stay in one part of the world to enjoy life while causing deaths and pains in other parts.

“As media people, it is important you educate our people for them to know that these sit-at-home enforcers are not after Mazi Nnamdi Kanu’s welfare or freedom. We must be able to separate the two.

“Ndigbo are on one page in demanding for the release of Nnamdi Kanu. I have also seen the President over this matter. Other Igbo leaders have made the same demand and we are not relenting.

“However, the so-called sit-at-home enforcers are mere criminals and our people must face them frontally.”

The governor also disclosed that technology had already been deployed to guarantee safety of residents, saying  there were no longer hideouts for criminals in the state. 

While responding, members of the media community lauded the efforts of the government in stamping out insecurity, offering suggestions on how to bring lasting peace and security to the state.

They expressed their readiness to collaborate with and support the government to achieve its plans for the people, promising that they would play a pivotal role to ensure the people return back to work through their reports.

[Tribune]

Without prejudice: information and opinions contained and expressed herein are personal legal opinions. They are merely presumptions of how the legal battle unfolding between Twitter Inc and Meta Inc may likely play out if the case ends up in court judging from my experience as an intellectual property lawyer. It may turn out differently but it will definitely not be far from what I analyzed here. 

Meta Inc launched a social platform app called Thread on Wednesday, the 5th of July, 2023, in less than twenty-four hours after they launched, they were slammed with a pre action notice by X Corp, the company that acquired Twitter Inc for 44B USD in October 2022.

In the letter dated July 5 which serves as a formal pre action notice from Twitter signed by their attorney, Alex Spiro, Twitter accused Meta of the following; 

1 misappropriation of trade secret 

2 intellectual property theft 

3 breach of non compete clause by Twitter former employees employed by Meta 

4 Employment of Twitter’s ex-employees by Meta. 

These are core issues that will be the focus in determining in court if Twitter has a clear case against Meta but how far and how possible can Twitter make their case against Meta especially establishing the allegation of intellectual property theft against Meta? 

Let’s address these issues raised one after the other; one of the allegations leveled by Twitter is that its formal employees breached their non-compete agreement by joining Meta Inc to build a Twitter similar app.

What does the law say in this regard; 

Section 16600 of the California Business and Professions Code states thus; “Except as provided in this chapter, every contract by which anyone is restrained from engaging in a lawful profession, trade, or business of any kind is to that extent void”. This provision means that a non-compete clause is null and void as it is generally unenforceable in California where both Twitter and Meta base and carry out their operation. Therefore, it is illegal in California to enforce non-compete agreements that put limits on an employee’s future job prospects. 

North Dakota, Oklahoma, and Washington DC are some other states of the US where non compete clauses are unenforceable. In these States like California, an employee cannot be prohibited from working with another organization that is in the same line of trade as the previous employer.

Therefore, on the issue of breaching a non-compete clause, raised by Twitter the issue will not fly in court.

The subsequent issue raised by Twitter in their pre action notice which will form the bases of their upcoming lawsuit is the issue of misappropriation of trade secrets by its former employees which was utilized in the building of the Threads app.

The primary purpose of a non-compete clause in the contract of employment  is to protect trade secrets, confidential customer information, or intellectual properties so that an employee who leaves the organization will not utilize this information or disclose this information to competitors. This issue of misappropriation of trade secrets will be subsumed under a non-compete clause. Since we have established that the non-compete clause issue will not fly therefore this issue of misappropriation of trade secrets will not fly either.

The next issue raised by Twitter against Meta is the employment of their ex-employees. A company is not under any restriction or prohibited from employing staff that was fired from a competing organization. An ex-employee can legally move to another company if he so wishes. This was made legal in the state of California by the unenforceability of non compete clauses.  Therefore, this issue will as well be trashed out in court. 

The final issue raised by Twitter against Meta which tends to be the most critical issue is the allegation of intellectual property theft. It will be a herculean task for Twitter to legally prove to the satisfaction of the court that Meta stole their intellectual properties in the building of threads. That an app shares similarities with another app does not mean that the latter app stole the intellectual property of the formal. 

In determining intellectual property theft or infringement, what the court looks at is if the latter app is trying to pass off the formal’s product as theirs; if there are so many similarities either in name, design, logo, etc that users won’t be able to distinguish or differentiate the later app from the formal app. 

These questions will be answered in the negative as there are no close similarities in name, logo, design etc that will make users mistake Threads for Twitter.

The state of California generally encourages competition hence why cases of allegation of intellectual property theft amongst tech companies in the state rarely fly and there is a high standard of proof a claimant in suits like these do undergo so as to satisfy the court to give judgment in his favor. 

Stan Alieke Esq is a legal practitioner.

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Sokoto state government has set up a Commission of Inquiry to probe all land allocations and government assets sold or auctioned during the tenure of Governor Aminu Tambuwal.

The 5-man committee was led by Justice M.A. Pindiga (rtd) while Barrister Nasiru Muhammed Binji would serve as its Secretary.

Other members of the committee include Chief Jacob E. Ochidi, SAN; Alhaji Usman Abubakar and Barrister Lema Sambo Wali.

A statement signed by the Press Secretary to Governor Ahmed Aliyu noted that, the committee would also ascertain the government bank account and amount realized from the sales and auctions of the assets.

The statement added that the committee would examine the various allocations of Lands throughout the
state including government owned houses sold or auctioned.

The committee was given two months from the date of its first sitting to submit it report.

Former Kaduna Lawmaker, Shehu Sani, has berated those linking the Anambra Student, Mmesoma Ejikeme’s confession of forging her University Tertiary Matriculation Examination (UTME) result to the fallout of the 2023 election.

Naija News reports that the Anambra State Government committee of inquiry set up to look into the controversy surrounding the JAMB results indicted Mmesoma of forging her result unaided.

In a post via Twitter on Saturday, Sani said Mmesoma committed that crime at a time people are looking for a reason to keep the flames of verbal war alight.

Responding to how many people have used ethnicity to publicize the issue, the former Senator said the JAMB fraud would not have been a top issue of social discussion if it had happened in the North.

He further made a reference to a woman who allegedly stabbed her husband in Bauchi and people seemed uninterested because it is not from the East or West.

Sani tweeted: “The Girl forged UTME result. The commentaries for and against her are more of the fallout of the 2023 election than just forgery. For most people talking, their tongues are about the forgery but their hearts are politics. The Girl committed an offence at a time when people are looking for a reason to keep the flames of verbal war alight. The Girl flew a helicopter in between the Border of Ukraine and Russia.

“If the Girl is from Plateau or Niger, it wouldn’t have been as hot as this. A woman from Bauchi allegedly stabbed her husband to death. No one seems interested. If the woman is from the west and the husband is from the East or vice versa, the internet would have been on fire by now. Most Nigerians are now wearing ethno religious and political Sunglasses;everything is viewed from the perspective of that lenses.We are likely going to live like this for a very long time.”

Nigerian professional footballer who currently plays as a striker for Spanish Liga F club FC Barcelona, Asisat Oshoala, has been enlisted for the 2023 Ballon d’Or Award.

Naija News reports that the organiser of the award, France Football confirmed this on its official Twitter handle on Friday.

Before now, the 28-year-old Super Falcons forward got nominated in the Socrates Award category, which recognises outstanding solidarity actions carried out by football champions.

Oshoala is one of five individuals shortlisted for the award, which was established last year and named after the legendary Brazilian footballer Socrates.

Joining Oshoala as nominees in the category are Vinicius Jnr (Brazil/Real Madrid), Antonio Rudiger (Germany/Real Madrid), Marcus Rashford (England/Manchester United), and Alex Morgan (USA/San Diego Wave).

The nomination acknowledges Oshoala’s remarkable contributions to her community through the creation of the Oshoala Academy. The academy aims to provide its beneficiaries with high-quality football training and life skills education. It also empowers young women through sports, transforming them into community role models and ambassadors for the skills they acquire.

The announcement further stated that the nominees in other categories, including men’s, women’s, Yachine Trophy, and Kopa Trophy, will be revealed on September 6.

Naija News reports that Oshoala is currently in Australia with the Super Falcons, Nigeria’s national women’s football team, as they train for the upcoming FIFA Women’s World Cup, which New Zealand and Australia will host.

The Super Falcons are placed in Group B and will face Australia, Canada, and the Republic of Ireland during the group stages of the tournament.